♥ Life's Tough ♥

I am finally graduated. I am a university graduate now. I should be proud of myself but...i am not feeling happy.

I have not applied for job yet and I have several reasons for this.

1) I have to get my transcript first before I apply, so that i can apply with my final CGPA
2) I have no leave from work this few weeks. My mom went overseas and I have to look after her shop. So I have no time to go to college and apply for transcript.
3) My mom asked me to work for her for a few months until September or October, and I was like "wth??!!" *sigh*

After getting my results, I dare not tell my mom about it, not because i score badly, it is just that I do not want her to have high expectation on me. U know what, I once told my mom that I have a friend working in KPMG and got RM2460 per month, she was surprised that the salary is low. but we all know that RM2460 is considered high for a fresh graduate. so now you know how high her expectation on my future salary.

The second reason for not telling her is that she is very emotional. When she is in good mood, she will treat you nice, like buying present as a reward for scoring good results; when she is in bad mood, I will kena from her kao kao, she will probably say something like 'study so much for what? useless, work is better'. And she will tell all this to others. this is what i hate the most. Hmm...Life is tough~

I told my dad about my results, he was happy and said '哇，酱厉害啊’(smart..haha). And he will not say anything that is bad about me. He told my mom about my results and she has no reaction, she said nothing, probably is because I did not tell her myself. I knew about this when aunt called me and congratulated me.

Another sad thing was that I realized that my mom complaint about me in front of my sister and dad. I realized this when I wanted to go home and get my sweater before heading to karaoke with friends after work. When I opened the house door, my sister told me to be fast as mom is angry about me. I felt so innocent and I went out of the house quickly. the reason why she was angry is that I asked for one-day leave during her trip to Guangzhou, and I was considered '唔醒目’(tak pandai-pandai lah, nak off lagi bila dia nak outstation), somemore go karaoke with friends. (Hello? I went after work, what is the problem?)

I always try to be a good girl, but still not 100% good. I am not complaining but I really don't know how to be a 100% good girl....